skip to main |
skip to sidebar
Any day I can rewatch a Dario Argento classic is a good one, and now I even have an excuse to do so because of this review, so here we go with what's surprisingly the only Argento film to make it to the infamous nasties banned list, so get ready to be swept aside by the simple act of annihilation.
Plot:
What would you do if you were an author, and suddenly a maniac started killing people based on a book you wrote? And not only that but what if the maniac also stuffed pages from your book down the throats of the victims? I would probably follow the investigation closely, and write another book about that, and that's close to what's goin' on in Tenebrae as author Peter Neal experiences what I just said. Brutal murders a plenty follows, and everyone is trying to find out who the killer is including the police, Peter Neal, and everyone around him.
The murders get more brutal and gory as the film carries on, and among other things we get to witness axe-murder where nothing is left to the imagination, hand being chopped off painting white walls blood red, a lesbian couple getting killed, a girl being chased by killer dog sequence, and other fun. Among all that, flashbacks of a sexual encounter with a slut from the killers childhood who was played by a she-male nonetheless.
What's good:
Dario mixes violence, and gore with sleaze, horror, and an Agatha Christie type murder mystery in Tenebrae which was the second Argento film I ever saw after Opera many years ago, and is arguably Dario's best film. His trademark camera techniques are present too, giving this an artsy early 80's Italian feel. The acting is also good for an Argento film, Anthony Franciosa does a great job as Peter Neal, so does the rest of the cast, especially John Saxon as Neal's agent, and Daria Nicolodi, Dario's ex-wife. Several legends of the Italian horror cinema are also involved on the production side plus acting, like Michele Soavi, and Lamberto Bava.
Add an almost Goblin score to that. Three members including Simonetti did it because the band had just split up and Simonetti & co didn't have the rights to use the Goblin name. The score is a mix of your basic electronic horror soundtrack with a bit of Disco and Electro mixed in and a bunch of weird experimental music too which is perfect for the movie, and the Italo-Disco main theme works well on the dancefloors. I used to play it at times back in the old days as a DJ and it rocked the clubs. There's a 12" single of it with added breaks in the beginning of the song that any DJ, Horror or Disco fanatic should get even if they have the album.
Also the movie has plenty of beautiful women, some get naked too, and the mix of sex & violence was a sure way for a film to end up on the video nasties list. A final great thing about this is the murder mystery plot. Dario' always does his own killings when shooting films, but I dare you to find out who the real killer is. You will have a very hard time, but in the end it all makes as much sense as a Giallo should. Finally, this is a great film to introduce people to Argento, the Italian horror genre, and the giallo as it's a mix of the American and Italian styles of moviemaking.
What's bad:
Absolutely nothing. Dario Argento is one of the very best horror and giallo directors and this is one of the masterpieces from his golden era.
Verdict:
Horror and giallos don't get much better or more brutal but at the same time cinematically artistic as this. This shows the damage a Dario Argento at his very best could do, and Tenebrae is also typical of the Italian cinema of the 80's when it comes to style though this is a lot better than the average later Italian Giallo. Another fantastic Goblin score, and different from their 70's work. They've always managed to change with the times, and be a bit ahead of them too so their newer albums are also great though very different from their older stuff, and the same can be said about Argento for the most part. Not only is this one of the best video nasties but one of the best horror and mystery movies of all time, period, so once you've eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth, so I give Tenebrae a solid...
6 (out of 6)
We continue with the Video Nasty reviews. Way overdue of course but it is what it is. Today's pick is nothing less than a Slasher classic. I've seen this one hundreds of times, but it's only right to watch again when reviewing and I suggest you do the same. Lock the doors, close the windows, lights off, and volume up loud. Don't move or you're DEAD! Light some candles or better yet make a skull and put some lit candles in it for decoration cause hey, that's exactly how The Burning starts.
Plot:
Summer camp, I must admit I loved it in junior high, and like me, the kids at Camp Blackfoot knows how to have fun, meaning pranks with a big P! Most of them quite innocent though like the camp bully, Glazer, about to get glazed by the trusty old airgun, and that shit hurts when it hits, trust me.
As much fun as summer camp is there's usually a kid or employee who ruins the fun, and The Burning is no exception as the camp caretaker Cropsy isn't exactly what you'd call popular among the kids, havin' a rep for being quite a bit of an asshole, so the kids decides to do the right thing, and get more than even on his ass.
Short story short, they sneak into his cabin at night while he sleeps, with the aforementioned homemade skull filled with maggots and lit candles for good measure. They place it by Cropsy's bed, sneak back outside, and starts bangin' his window to wake him up. Well he does, sees the skull, and has a heavy panic attack. Unfortunately for him he bumps the skull over, lighting fire to his own bed, and yes you guessed it, not only does the bed catch on fire but so does the whole cabin with Cropsy inside. Now I've done some heavy pranks in my days but they never turned out quite as bad as this one...
But!...Cropsy survives, and ends up in a hospital with n'th degree burns all over his body. There he's known as the hospital monster. The freak that's burnt so bad that it is what the new doctors needs to see. It's where it's at, and Cropsy is by now a fuckin' Big Mac!...Overdone!
However, not for long, as the Big Mac escapes the hospital, and goes on a killing rampage revenge spree for the kids who were responsible for turning man into monster, so back to the old camp he goes, and that is when the slicing and dicing slasher fun starts, and The Burning has plenty of it. Cropsy stabs, chops, axes, and more than anything, hacks, and he doesn't settle for only the kids who turned him into a monster but any kid that comes in his way gets the Cropsy treatment. He's literally on fire!
What's good:
This is one of the few films that manages to mix comedy with horror without it becoming too silly. The kill and gore scenes are heavy which is why it was banned, thanks to fx master Tom Savini who actually turned down working on Friday The 13th. part 2 in favor of The Burning, but the comedy somewhat lightens up the mood in between the blood and guts.
If you ever went to summer camp this is as real as it gets and brings back fond memories, well, except for a murdering maniac being about, as that was of course mostly campfire tales, and The Burning was based on a real such tale about the Cropsy Maniac. Then there's the incredible musical score! Rick Wakeman's synth score just might be the greatest of all time for a slasher movie, only rivaled by Carpenter/Howarth's original Halloween score in my opinion. All the characters or just about, are likeable too so we don't want em to die, well maybe except for the bully, "You got that!", but even he is a good guy at the end of his days.
What's bad:
For the first time I can't find much bad things to say when reviewing a movie. To some it might be that this film's from the 80's so it's slower than modern films, and a bit outdated, but that's just the way I like em, especially since I grew up in the 80's, and there never was or will be a better time to grow up in. There's also a scene early on where Cropsy kills a prostitute which doesn't make much sense as there were no prostitutes at Camp Blackfoot, no? However that scene looks great in a very Dario Argento type way, but it's out of place considering the revenge type plot.
The verdict:
This is the perfect slasher movie, once again only rivaled by the original Halloween, perfect cast of quite a few who became famous later like Holly Hunter and that guy from Seinfeld, direction by Tony Maylam is superb, villain, plot, musical score, I could go on and on. One of my favorite slashers and one of the very best video nasties that really wasn't nasty enough to be one, but it still delivers on the gore, and the fun, and that means repeated viewings, and plenty of 'em. They truly don't make em like this no more, and it's rep hasn't been ruined by sequels or god forbid, a remake, and if you plan on doing a remake beware that Cropsy's still out there...waiting...watching.
The Burning, you're never gonna forget this man, as long as you live, so for the first time on this blog it will have to be a...
Score:
6 (out of 6)
